Begala on Bush

I mentioned on Saturday that Paul Begala gave a speech here. Today, I'll look at the DO review, which shows us that he tends to say stupid things in places other than the Crossfire studio. I'll try to dissect the stuff he said:

Crossfire' commentator criticizes Bush

Criticizing Bush? WOW! No liberal has tried that yet!!!

President George W. Bush is a good candidate, a good politician and a good person - but he's a bad president, said Paul Begala, co-host of CNN's "Crossfire," to less than 100 people attending his lecture at Goldstein Auditorium Saturday night.

"Less than 100 people." Bwahaha.

In his speech sponsored by the Syracuse University College Democrats, Begala gave the audience a crash course on how politics works, how politicians think and how Republicans view Bush.

This is the best the College Democrats could do? Combine this with Paul Krugman and Molly Ivins, the other liberal speakers who have been here or have been scheduled to appear recently, and you get a pretty good idea of how credible they are. Heh.

"I like the hell out of George W. He's a friend of mine," said the Democrat, dressed in a navy blue suit, with a powder blue shirt and pinstripe royal blue tie. "He likes to curse like me - He knows a lot about baseball but not too much about the economy."

Classic. "Bush is a great friend, a great politician, and a great person, BUT...He's evil!!!"

"Republicans talk like he's Kim Jong," Begala said, referring to the popular dictator of North Korea. "They pretend he's 10 feet tall, perfect and we must worship him.

This guy must hang around with some really dumb Republicans. Personally, I support Bush because he's about the best we can do until a real conservative runs for office. I don't friggin' "worship" the guy.

He didn't even win the election. We have a right to criticize him."

I also have a right to criticize you because you're still parroting the asinine "Gore won" meme. Get. Over. It.

At the same time as the SU men's basketball team was defeating Maryland to advance to the Sweet 16 in the NCAA Tournament, Begala outlined how John Kerry could defeat Bush in the upcoming election.

"He's gotta start saying 'f**k' more often!!!"

"Bush already has his slogan in the campaign: 'I'm a war president, stay the course. Don't change now,'" Begala said. "What Kerry should say is, 'If you want to keep an economy with people out of work, vote for Bush. But if you want change, vote for me. If you want to keep your troops in Iraq without allies and enough armor, vote for Bush.'"

Translation: "If you want to punish rich people for being successful, vote for Kerry. If you want to beg terrorists for forgiveness and let the UN control our army, vote for Kerry. If you're NOT a braindead lunatic, vote for Bush."

Begala believes Kerry has a stronger case to argue on issues like Iraq and the economy, Begala said, but it won't be an easy fight for him.

He has a stronger case because he can argue for both sides at the same time. How do you win a debate against that?

"This will be the most vicious and nasty campaign we've ever had," Begala said. "Bush will do or say anything to win this election.

"The Republican Smear Machine™ is coming to question our patriotism!!!"

He said in 2000 he would be a uniter, not a divider. But he's the most divisive president we've ever had.

And I'm sure that's all his fault, not the fault of people who still think he didn't win the f**king election.

This nice, pleasant guy from Texas is more divisive than Nixon, Clinton and Reagan."

"If I say it, it must be true!"

"He's not conservative - he's radical," Begala continued.

If by "radical," you mean "one gay marriage away from being liberal," you're on the right track.

"I'm conservative because I want to conserve the Constitution."

"Except that mean, nasty electoral college!"

Begala also criticized Bush for attempting to amend the Constitution to outlaw gay marriages while ignoring other current issues.

I love how he assumes that Bush is ignoring other issues just because the media decided to focus on same-sex marriage.

"The thing has only been amended 17 times since the Bill of Rights, and he already has seven amendments for us," Begala said.

Do you think they had this same discussion before the other 17?

"He says don't pay attention to health care costs rising, the jobless economy, lobbyists writing environmental laws. But be scared of two guys making out in Massachusetts.

They can make out until their friggin' tongues fall off, for all we care. They just shouldn't expect the government to give them a certificate of approval for it. What happened to "stay out of our bedrooms?"

The gay issue will not change the direction of this country. Seven-trillion-dollar debt and a war in Iraq will."

"Maybe he'll find some more countries to invade," Begala added.

Good. North Korea would be a good start.

Begala compared running against an incumbent to a job interview. Whether the job is up for bid is the first question asked, he said. It's not which candidate is better, but how the president is doing.

So, does this mean we can't question Kerry without questioning Bush as well? I believe this warrants an HFC.

"When you think about the direction of the country, is it going in the right direction or have things gotten off the right track?" Begala asked, explaining the original question posed by Gallup Polls in 1948. "So where are we now? The New York Times said 38 percent think we're going in the right direction. It's not 14 percent - a terrible job - or 55 percent - an easy re-election. The job is up for bid. Now he'll have to earn it. And hopefully more than a 5-4 decision."

"Electoral votes? What are those? I only care about getting my guy in office!"

Organizers believe the lower than expected attendance to the event was partially because Begala's speech started during the Syracuse basketball game.

You think? They're only the defending national champions.

Jessica Klos, president of the College Democrats, said she almost had a nervous breakdown when she found out about the game overlapping in time with the event.

"The VRWC has taken over the NCAA!!!"

"I'm still happy people came out," Klos said. "I was very impressed."

Josh Chambers, a senior political science and information management major, said that he thought Begala would be more hard-nosed.

"It wasn't what I expected," said Chambers, a member of the College Democrats. "He said Bush was a good guy. I expected him to be harder on Bush."

This says a lot about what kind of people we're dealing with here. "Bush is a good guy? LIAR! He's the devil!!!!!!"

Begala urged the audience to participate in this year's election regardless of who they vote for because there are many important decisions to be made about pressing issues and only a small number of students participate in elections.

Hopefully, those who participate aren't members of the College Democrats.

"Me no vote Bush! Bush big meanie!"

"The biggest threat to our future and life is not terrorism. It's my colleagues telling you to stay home and watch American Idol," Begala said. "Monarchies don't start revolutions. People in Washington are fine with that because they can run things. I want you to run things. That's why I'm here."

Did that make sense to anyone? He completely lost me.

Jennifer Clark, a freshman civil engineering major and long-time supporter of Begala, said his speech helped her understand Bush as a man and not just as a president.

"I got a better insight into how politicians think," Clark said. "This got me more into learning about the election. I'm more interested than I was before. It was really amazing to hear him speak."

If Paul Begala's views inform hers, I'm afraid for the future of this country. In response to him and his little speech, I'd like to offer a quote from the SNL version of Chris Matthews:

"Shut up, Begala! You look like a defective Pez dispenser!"

Posted by CD on March 22, 2004 12:42 PM
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