He's Not Even Original

Nader Calls for Bush to Be Impeached

Wow. Nobody's thought of that before. Let's see if he can at least come up with some new and wacky justification for it. Cue the jester!

Independent presidential candidate Ralph Nader called Tuesday for President Bush to be impeached for "deceiving the American people night after night after night" about U.S. involvement in Iraq.

Just nights? Is he a vampire?

Insert leftist here: "Bush sucks........BLOOD!"

"When you plunge our country into war on a platform of fabrications and deceptions, and you bring back thousands of American soldiers who are sick, injured or dead, and that war is unconstitutionally authorized to begin with, Mr. Bush's behavior qualifies for the high crimes and misdemeanor impeachment clause of the Constitution," the 2000 Green Party presidential nominee said to applause from about 200 students at Columbia College Chicago.

Unconstitutionally authorized? How do you explain Senator Kerry's voting/not voting for the war then?

Nader said President Clinton was impeached for "far less of an offense."

Well, you see, Ralph, Clinton ACTUALLY. BROKE. THE LAW. There's a difference between perjury and "Mommy, Mommy, Georgie the liar is hurting brown people! Send him to his room in Crawford!!!"

"Lying under oath is not a trivial offense...

Depends on what your definition of "is" is.

...but it cannot compare with deceiving the American people night after night after night on national television, staging untruths and rejecting the advice of his advisers," he said.

I didn't realize his advisors were all against it. Other than some Dick named Clarke.

Merrill Smith, a spokeswoman for Bush's re-election campaign, declined to comment.

Why do they even mention that?

"Look at this deceptive, secretive administration! They don't answer every single smear we throw at them! EEEEEEEEEEEVIL!!!!!!!!"

Nader previously called for Bush's impeachment during an anti-war rally March 20 in the president's hometown of Crawford, Texas, to mark the first anniversary of the U.S.-led invasion of Iraq.

You know...it just occurred to me that impeaching Bush would kind of defeat the purpose of campaigning against him. What a platform:

"I can win the election, but only if you get rid of the guy who's in office now!"

Nader, a longtime consumer advocate...

What does that even mean?

...was in Illinois to gather the 25,000 signatures he needs before June 21 to qualify for the state ballot. He failed Monday to qualify for Oregon's ballot, but said he would try again under another option there.

You'd think he would realize that he probably doesn't have a chance in the election if he can't even get enough signatures to be on the ballot.

Many Democrats blame Nader for Democrat Al Gore's loss to Republican George W. Bush in 2000, and have urged him not to run this time. They cite the vote Nader captured in close contests in New Hampshire and Florida and argue that Gore would have won if either state had gone to the then-vice president.

I like how they just assume that everyone who voted for Nader would've voted for Gore otherwise. "Those Republican sheeple would never vote against their fascist party!"

But Nader says Gore is to blame for his misfortune, and he rejected the idea that he could draw support away from Massachusetts Sen. John Kerry, the presumptive Democratic presidential nominee.

I love the "presumptive" thing. Go Kucinich!

In Portland, Ore., on Monday, former Democratic presidential contender Howard Dean...

YEEEAAAGH!!!!

...warned that "a vote for Ralph Nader is the same as a vote for George Bush."

Brilliant. They're so caught up in Bush hatred that their only real criticism of Nader is "he'll make Bush win."

An audience member in Chicago was booed for suggesting something similar.

Does that mean the boo-ers were questioning his patriotism? I bet it does.

...I don't know where that came from.

Nader responded: "What we have to tell the two parties in unmistakable terms is that this country does not belong to two parties."

Uh...if you have to tell two parties, I'm guessing most of the country does belong to them. I could be wrong though...

Nothing new here. Move along. Go back to your homes. Don't make me release the poison monkeys. You don't want that.

Posted by CD on April 8, 2004 05:38 PM
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