Is This the Best They Can Do?

Have I mentioned that the Pittsburgh Post-Gazette sucks? Well, it does. Today's letters to the editor are almost painful to read. Let's look at a few!

First, we have one explaining why President Bush's failure to serve in Vietnam is relevant to the war in Iraq:

Ignorance of war makes Bush vulnerable to surprise

President Bush's reaction to the recent revelations that American soldiers committed atrocities on Iraqi prisoners of war was surprising. He was shocked -- shocked! -- that American soldiers -- some under the prodding of American civilians -- had acted shamefully. Or shamelessly.

Maureen Dowd would be proud of that paragraph.

The president -- and many of those around him -- tried to distance themselves from the actions of these people:

WHAT? Haven't they been kissing everyone's @ss for the last week trying to apologize for it?

This is a handful of people, not the whole army. These are just a few bad apples in a big bushel of apples. We are not like them.

REALLY? I wasn't aware of that, because I haven't heard it hundreds of times in the last few days.

It is in moments like this that I am sorry that our now-president opted out of overseas service during the Vietnam war.

Yeah, because the National Guard never gets sent into combat. They just fly them big purty jets cause they makes loud noiseses. Idiot.

I am also sorry that so many others of this administration have no real firsthand experience with war. That ignorance may be one of the reasons for their enthusiasm for war rather than other means of achieving an end.

How much are you willing to bet that this person also uses the "only women who have been pregnant can have an opinion about abortion" argument?

But that ignorance also leaves them gasping with surprise and shock when they discover that war is hell. War is terrible for a variety of reasons. Soldiers get killed all the time in war. Not only that, but very often civilians also get killed.

Everybody. In. The world. Knows that.

Since when do you have to go to war to realize that horrible things happen? IT'S F**KING WAR!!!!

There's more of that letter, but I think that was the most entertaining part. Now, our next writer tries to explain why today's Republicans are fascists. I'm totally serious. They actually printed this. Let's take a look:

Disturbing trend

E.J. Dionne Jr.'s April 30 column ("Death to Moderates") points directly at the very disturbing trend within the Republican Party toward the hard-line right-wing neoconservatism espoused in the Project for the New American Century.

I bet you post on Democratic Underground. Am I right? I mean, come on! Is this really the best they can do?

"The far right-wing wants to turn the entire world into an American empire! We're doooooooooooomed!!!!!"

I really don't understand the delusion that this administration is even close to being right-wing. Have you heard the term RINO?

Although this trend was probably conceived during the Nixon administration...

Holy crap, I think I see a conspiracy theory on the horizon.

...it has finally burst forth in all its viciousness with the inauguration of the current Bush administration.

What f**king "viciousness?" This is one of the most liberal Republican administrations we've ever had, and yet, it's all part of the VRWC? What are these people smoking?

The intolerance of moderates within their own rank and file...

*COUGH* Colin Powell *COUGH COUGH*

...the use of intimidation and threats against those who do not tow the party line...

Okay, that's all the proof I needed that this letter is based on one of the writer's hallucinations. Point out ONE example of "intimidation and threats" against anyone besides foreign terrorists, and maybe I'll take your lunatic ramblings seriously...but don't count on it.

...questioning the patriotism of anyone who dares to disagree with or question the current administration's policies...

You're thinking of John Kerry and his wife.

I still can't believe they printed this...

...Sen. Rick Santorum's "K Street" strategy...

I have no idea what that means.

...the current administration's double-speak...

It's called "stuttering," and it doesn't make Dubya a worse president, just a bad public speaker.

...That is what you meant, right?

...and its insistence on secrecy and executive privilege and so on...

Because no other administration has EVER kept things secret.

...testify to the fact that the Grand Old Party of Abraham Lincoln is now the party of Francisco Franco and Benito Mussolini.

And there you have it. Because the Bush administration has been the target of numerous lies and misrepresentations, they're fascists. Unbefrigginlievable.

Let's look at one more letter. This one tries to compare the flawless, golden years of the Clinton adminstration with the oppressive, dark, evil Bush regime (keep in mind that I was 15 when Clinton left office, so this isn't going to be brilliant):

Good years and bad

In response to the April 23 letter "Clinton's Disgrace" by Gary T. Getsy: If a year was wasted during the Lewinsky matter, it was due to the relentless obsession of the Republicans to get President Clinton out of office.

It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that he committed perjury. Perish the thought!

He worked hard for all people and our country.

Especially the interns!

As the circus droned on, countries were laughing at us.

At us? Or with us? You be the judge.

What? It sounded funny.

During the Clinton years, people took pride in going to work instead of going to the welfare offices.

I haven't heard that one: "The Bush administration invented welfare, and nobody ever needed it before now! EVER!!!!!"

And isn't unemployment currently at the exact. same. rate. as it was during Clinton's term?

States had funds to hire many policemen, school teachers and children were not left behind.

Funny, I didn't notice any change in the quality of those things that coincided with presidential changes. It's almost as if the president isn't the only person in the country who can influence things.

People were enjoying vacations, new cars, homes, education and the feeling that it was great to be an American.

I still enjoy all those things. So do a lot of other people. And it's not like Bush has been taking any of that away from people.

"The VRWC has declared that vacations and new cars are unpatriotic! Now bow before the Elephant of Wisdom, or he shall smite thee!"

When President Clinton left office our national debt was at an all-time low. The large surplus was there for a national emergency.

So...if we had a large surplus, isn't it good that we pay less taxes now? Oh, wait, I forgot that the government ALWAYS spends money better than the unwashed masses. Save me, Big Brother Government, save me!

Today the debt is going to the moon, the surplus was given to the rich.

"Given to the rich." Read that again. "Given. To the rich."

THEY HAVEN'T "GIVEN" ANYTHING TO ANYONE, YOU IDIOT! THEY LET THEM KEEP THEIR F**KING MONEY! AND THEY DID THIS FOR EVERYONE WHO PAYS F**KING TAXES!!!!!!

Or maybe I imagined my family's tax refund, which we used to buy new furniture and other nice things for the house. Do we owe the government money now?

What happened? Bush happened.

That sounds dirty. Which was probably the writer's intention.

What President Clinton did as a husband was Hillary's business.

Apparently, she thinks that it should be everyone's business. I mean, she did write a book about it.

What he did as president was our business. If Hillary can forgive, we can too. It's time.

I'm glad you use Hillary Clinton as a moral role model. That explains a lot.

To his critics: Make your words soft and sweet. You don't know when you may have to eat them.

All right, it would be way too easy to make an intern joke there, so I'm just going to stop typing now, before I get carried away.

Is it any wonder the city of Pittsburgh is bankrupt? It's full of idiots like these.

Posted by CD on May 11, 2004 03:54 PM
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