I'm starting to think everyone around me is in on some big inside joke, and they're all going to jump out from behind a door one of these days and yell "surprise." I can't possibly be living in the same reality as them.
You see, the topic of discussion among students before the TRF midterm was "how to avoid being drafted." Which is kind of weird, since THERE IS NO MOTHERF**KING DRAFT. Here are some more of the paraphrased quotes you've all come to expect from SIT:
-"They can draft girls now, you know. The best thing to do is get pregnant. They won't send a pregnant woman to the front lines."
-"They can't draft you if you're allergic to bees, right?"
-"If there's a draft, Canada is my new home."
- "If we go to North Korea, there has to be a draft." (after I told him there wasn't a draft)
What world are you people living in? There. isn't. going. to. be. a. draft. I even explained that to one of 'em:
"You know the draft was proposed by Charles Rangel, a Democrat, right? And that it was just voted down a couple weeks ago? And that everyone in the administration is against the draft? And it would be political suicide to have one?"
I really don't understand it. Why are so many people worried about the draft when there isn't one and there probably won't be one? Are they really that impressionable?
When liberals say "I weep for our nation," it's because they think Bush will destroy the world. When I say "I weep for our nation," it's because so many liberals think Bush will destroy the world. Kind of an interesting parallel.
UPDATE
Oh, and to all the people who are talking about leaving the country to escape the evil Bushchimperialist...
I WILL BUY YOU A PLANE TICKET IF YOU PROMISE TO SHUT UP.
Posted by CD on November 4, 2004 02:55 PMHey, if you've got that kind of money to burn, why not just send a fake draft notice to every Liberal you know? A lot more laughs, a lot less cost. And you can get pictures.
Posted by: CavalierX at November 4, 2004 03:27 PMBwheh. heh heh.
"OH CRAP!!!! I'VE BEEN DRAFTED!!!! HALLIBURTON IS TRYING TO KILL ME!!!!!!!!!!"
(runs to Quebec)
(breaks ankle)
(waits ten years to get seen at government-run hospital)
(slight breeze comes in through window)
"OH CRAP!!!! THE DRAFT FOLLOWED ME!!!"
Sorry, got carried away. Did you get it?
Posted by: Army NCO Guy at November 4, 2004 04:24 PMActually, I got a better idea. Tell 'em all that I said the draft will start next Tuesday. It's Cheneyrumsfeld's supersecret plan to get everyone between 12 and 55 years old over to Iraq to build the big oil pipeline to Texas. But they're gonna close the border to Canada at midnight Monday night. They better hurry! Go! Quick! Ashcroft is following you!
Posted by: Army NCO Guy at November 4, 2004 04:37 PMDo you know who is responsible for more kitten deaths second only to masturbation? Yep, THE DRAFT.
Who's the black private dick thats a sex machine with a the chicks? DRAFT, can ya dig it?
That's all for now.
Posted by: tommy at November 4, 2004 04:37 PMBwheh, once again. Good one tommy.
Posted by: Army NCO Guy at November 4, 2004 04:42 PM~bow~
:-D
Heh. I love having readers who are funnier than me. Makes the job easier.
Posted by: CD at November 4, 2004 05:51 PMHoly sh*t. I didn't think people actually BELIEVED that stuff.
Posted by: Alex D. at November 5, 2004 08:09 PMThe only thing more disturbing than the fact that so many people can be so fundamentally dishonest as to feign anxiety about a draft they know isn't going to happen... is the fact that so many people are horrified at the concept.
But for a rare breed, no one wants to die. But the fact that there exist so many folks out there to whom nothing is more important than their own personal safety should jar each of us. Furthermore, unless I'm mistaken, when you're 18 years old, you have a choice: Register with the Selective Service (in case of a draft) or get the ____ out of the country. Not all of us are keen on the idea of a draft, but we all registered for it. If you didn't, then you have nothing to worry about.
It angers me to see that so many people want to suck the American system dry and refuse to sacrifice anything in return--they want to reap but not sow, take but not give, cash in but never pay out. If we're going to live in this country and eat of the fruits, then we'd better be ready to prove our worth. If you registered with the SSS because you wanted to be a beneficiary, and there is a draft, you have a legal and moral obligation to comply.
Conservatives have been on the defensive for Bush, with their primary argument being "There's not going to be a draft." Is that true? Yes. But it's hardly the point. We should be arguing from the standpoint "What are you afraid of?" They took and they took and they took. Now they need to be ready to give should the need arise.
Posted by: douglaschip at November 7, 2004 06:42 PM