Speech Blogging

All right, it's time for some "live" blogging. Live as in "typing as I watch a speech and then posting it immediately." I'm not going to try and update throughout like some people do. This will be pretty much stream-of-consciousness, as I did with the SOTU and the Democratic debate, so I'll put it in the extended entry for the sake of everyone's sanity. Also, my computer desk is in the corner of my room, so I have to look to the right to see the TV, then back to the left to see the computer. Therefore, random typos may be present even after proofreading.

Anyway...let's get started.

All right, Chris Matthews just said that the speech is coming up in a moment (I'm watching it on MSNBC), so I guess the action is about ready to begin. Hey, I almost forgot that it's in Pennsylvania. That's where I am...oh, they just announced him. They're clapping. Good. And there he is...smirking...DU is going to hate that. Now they're standing. He's smirking again. That actually bothers me. Don't ask why.

Oh, crap, he's slurring already. The actions of our enemies have been brutal, calculating, and instructive...Izadeen Saleem? Is that how you spell that? Way to enunciate, Dubya.

Now he mentioned Berg's murder. It was a vile display, showing a contempt for the rules of warfare. It reveals fanaticism that would not be appeased by any concession. Nice. He named Zarqawi. He's connecting Iraq to the WoT. THANK YOU! "It was a distraction, it was a distraction!!!!"

Uh-oh. My headphones are malfunctioning. That isn't good. I missed part of it.

Now he's pointing out that the "insurgents" are members of Saddam's forces. And they're terrorists. And foreign fighters and extremists have joined them to seize regional power for themselves. They share a goal: They hope to wear out the patience of Americans, our coalition, and Iraqis before the arrival of an effective self-government, and...freedom. Man, I need to type faster.

The way forward may sometimes appear chaotic. Why didn't he mention the media? Now they're clapping.

Okay, so far, so good. He made it clear that we're fighting terror, not Iraqi militia. And he hasn't mispronounced anything yet.

People prefer freedom. Danged right, they do. Terrorists are against progress, they only want death and violence. We want freedom, independence, security, and prosperity for the Iraqi people. He says we'll be safer after the war. I think the low rate of terrorism proves that. Heh.

Iraq is our friend. Ooh, five steps! Let's see what they are:

-Hand over...aw, crap, I lost track. Stupid keyboard.

Step one: Transfer full sovereignity to an Iraqi government, clear the way for national elections. I guess he's still keeping the June 30 date. I'm guessing the terrorists won't like that. He'd better be ready for a fight. Iraq will have a new prime minister, but the composition of the government hasn't been decided yet. Interim officials being announced this week. Sweet.

Different departments and ministries...he said "diversity." I'm not sure what to think.

Iraq already controls 12 ministries? I didn't know that. I thought the eeeeevil imperialist Americans were jackbooting all freedom away.

Are they ready for self-government? Do they want it? YES!!!! Representative government, yay! They've elected town councils and city governments, and a civil society is emerging. We need the transfer to happen. They don't like foreign control. Well, so much for the "taking over the country" meme. He's clearly making the case that we don't particularly like being there either, and we're going to leave the country to them as soon as we can. Nice.

Step two: Establish security and stability. Fight terrorists, illegal militia, and Saddam loyalists. We need to maintain a troop level of 138,000. Extended duty is necessary for 20,000 people who were scheduled to leave in April. He will send more troops if needed.

He thanks the soldiers for their sacrifices, courage, duty, etc. That got a lot of applause. He looks nervous. I wonder why (/sarcasm).

Fa-loo-ja. I was wondering how to pronounce that. I've only read it on the Internet. I thought it was Fa-loo-ha. Friggin' Spanish classes influencing my pronunciations of foreign words.

He's giving the Iraqi people credit for their own abilities. Fallujah, Najaf, Karbala, Kufah? Where's that?

He's talking about Sadr. Using holy shrines as shields. Not to mention civilians, I might add. A mosque was cleared of weapons. Maybe they were just holy weapons. It seems like every grain of sand in the Middle East is a frickin' holy site. "This is the holy rock of Baghdad!!!! Mohammed stepped on it once!"

...Sorry, got sidetracked there. Back to the speech.

We're training Iraqi fighters better. They have an Iraqi chain of command, with the best possible leadership. Good. 260,000 Iraqis are being trained. That's a lot. 13 batallions will be there by "Joo-ly" the first. O...kay.

Step three: Continue rebuilding the nation's infrastructure. Economic independence and a better quality of life are needed. Hospitals and schools, health clinics, bridges, electricity, modern communications, private economy, new currency, open foreign investment...liberalized trade policy, participation in the World Trade Organization...

He's talking about oil revenues. Oh, look, it's helping the Iraqis, not Halliburton. OOOOOOOOIL!!!!!

He's breaking up. I think his attention span just gave out. Get outta there, Dubya, before it's too late! I think he has ADD. I should know.

...I Got sidetracked again. See what I mean?!

New prison system...he screwed up the word "Abu Ghraib." That was embarrassing. Allow me to phonetically reproduce the sound he made:

"Ab-u...Gh..a...rabe..."

Dang it, don't you practice? The left will be all over that. "Look, he's so guilty, he can't even say the name of the torture chamber!" Crap crap crap crap crap. It's Ah-boo-grabe. Dang it.

U.N. participation? Yeah, that'll help. Most nations have expressed support for a free Iraq, apparently. He will thank our 15 NATO allies next month, who have 17,000 troops on the ground as part of the unilateral invasion.

Step four: Free national elections by next January. We're forming an election commission for an orderly, accurate national election to choose a transitional national assembly. They'll draft a new constitution which will be presented in fall of 2005. They'll have a permanent government by the end of next year.

Iraqis are united in a broad and deep conviction: They're determined never again to live at the mercy of a dictator. Representative government will protect basic rights and defend them from the return of tyranny, and that election is coming. In 18 months. Okay.

Step five: He didn't say what step five is. Maybe it's "Profit."

Terrorists will not determine the future of Iraq. Hopefully, it'll be because they're dead and in hell. Say that, Dubya!

Iraqis will raise a government to reflect their own culture and values. We went to Iraq to make its people free, not to make them American. They will write their own history and find their own way. As they do, Iraqis can be certain that they will always have a friend in the United States of America. Man, transcription is hard.

He mentioned 9/11 and Afghanistan. Orange Alert, ricin, dirty bombs, Madrid, Istanbul, Tunis, Bali...I think they just want to show off his ability to say these words.

We must keep our focus. We must do our duty. History will tend toward hope, or tend toward tragedy. The enemy wants to impose "Taliban-like rule." It's called "radical Islam," Dubya. Say it. Say it so people realize who the enemy really is.

They seek weapons of mass destruction to impose their will through blackmail and catastrophic attacks. "None of this is an expression of a religion." Yeah, sure it is. It's not all political, but I think he just has to say that so people don't call him a bigot.

Fa-na-ta-ci-sm. Sound it out. Sound. It. Out.

America will be safer when hope has returned to the Middle East. Afghanistan is coming to life, and two ideologies are contending for the future of Iraq...or something.

We will not fail. We will perservere and defeat this enemy. And...that's all, folks. Hmm...Matthews has Joe Biden on his show. Okay.

"I'm quite frankly disappointed..." Oh, shut up. TV off.

So, that's the plan. Sounds about right. It outlined our plans pretty well, I'd say. He could've mentioned the sarin and mustard gas. Or the averted attack in Jordan. But he's probably waiting on those. He has a tendency to do that so the media looks dumb. He also said nothing about Kerry, or domestic policies, or anything of the sort, so that gives him points for focus. It's too bad the Democrats don't seem to have the ability to focus on one thing without attacking their opponent.

That's about it. You may now return to your meaningful activities.

Posted by CD on May 24, 2004 08:45 PM
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