Semi-Intelligent Thoughts

We May Live in an Unjust, Uncaring Universe...

...but sometimes, the good guys still win.

Allow me to offer some pointed and thoughtful commentary on this momentous occasion:

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! SUCK A FLAMING COCK IN HELL, YOU EVIL PIECE OF SHIT! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

That is all.

Never Forget

There's something profoundly creepy about watching some of MSNBC's replay of their 9/11 coverage, then walking to the kitchen and looking out the window at Manhattan, especially since the weather here at the moment is virtually identical to the way it was nine years ago.

Somehow, the idea that that shit actually fucking happened is a bit easier to comprehend after the above experience. It almost feels more real now than it did as a 16 year-old watching it on a TV with horrible reception in a Pennsylvania public school. That full story is here, incidentally. Fun fact: the friend of my brother's who wrote "fuck the middleast" at Ground Zero went on to join the Army after high school. Seriously.

Also, MSNBC replayed President Bush's initial statement after the attacks, which somehow had the biggest emotional impact on me. I guess I just miss having a real man in the White House.

Never. Fucking. Forget.

UPDATE

A couple of pics from this morning, just to show you what I mean:

The place where the towers would've been isn't actually visible from here, but you get the idea.

GROUND ZERO MOSQUE

...

What? Why am I not suddenly getting thousands of readers? Aren't those three words in the title THE MOST IMPORTANT ISSUE IN THE UNIVERSE?

Seriously, I understand the significance of this controversy (if you don't know what I'm referring to, where have you been for the past two weeks?), but bloggers seem to have forgotten that they're allowed to write about other things, too.

Since plenty has been said about it already, I can't add much, but I want to focus on a specific piece of criticism coming from the mosque's defenders.

It seems they're justifying this ridiculous project by saying that it's actually a "community center," not a mosque, even though it just happens to be centered around an Islamic prayer space and is endorsed by Hamas. Therefore, those who object to its presence are simply motivated by their hatred of diversity.

This reminds me of a scene from the Ladder to Heaven episode of South Park. I'll just quote the relevant portion here, and if my position isn't clear enough, I'm not sure what else I can do:

[Heaven. Weapons of mass destruction are seen among the clouds. Saddam is right there shouting directions]

Saddam Hussein: Keep those nitrogen capsules over there by the warheads! Right. Chop-chop. Come on!

[a bright beam of light lands on Saddam, who shields his eyes]

God: Saddam. I've been hearing rumors that you're secretly building weapons of mass destruction up here.

Saddam Hussein: Weapons of mass destruction? Nooo! This is a chocolate chip factory. See?

[displays boxes of "Saddam's Heavenly Chocolate Chips"]

God: It looks like a chemical weapons plant.

Saddam Hussein: Look, God, if I was gonna secretly build a chemical weapons plant, I wouldn't make it look like a chemical weapons plant, would I? I'd make it look like a chocolate chip factory or something.

God: ...Alright, just checking.

[removes the beam of light]

Saddam Hussein: [giggles] Stupid asshole!

[goes back to work]

HOLY CRAP

Abu Musab al-Zarqawi Killed in Bombing Raid

...

WOOHOO!!! About time that fuckbastard got what was coming to him.

UPDATE
Is anyone else finding it difficult to look at phrases like "Zarqawi dead," etc. without laughing uncontrollably?

Not because it's absurd or anything, but because it's so. freakin'. AWESOME.

Two years ago (wow, it's been a while), I said this:

If we ever catch the f**king murderous b@stards who killed Nick Berg, we should execute them with a rusty guillotine.

But...I think two large bombs did the job well enough.

Would it be tasteless to do a little creative editing on the "Zarqawi holding up Nick Berg's head" photo so it's Zarqawi's head being displayed? I think maybe it would be...but I might do it anyway.

UPDATE THE SECOND
Much less graphic photo than the one mentioned above, but I'll put it in the extended entry anyway:

Terror Hits London

As I'm sure you're aware by now, I sleep really late, so I just saw this.

I really don't have a lot to say. These fucking terrorfucks just don't fucking get it. I'd like to briefly address a part of this post to them:

Look, you sadistic subhuman shitbags, your whole fucking ideology is futile. You're not going to win. All you're doing is condemning yourselves and thousands more like you to death and pissing off millions around the world. Every time you do this, it turns more people against you. Your days were already numbered, and now they're even shorter. Fuck you, fuck your fraudulent death-cult, fuck your supporters, and fuck everyone who has even an ounce of sympathy for you. You are nothing. DIE.

Okay, back to business.

The reaction to this has not been uniform, and it will only get worse. Some will properly blame the terrorists, some will blame Bush and Blair, some will blame the Jews, and others will find new scapegoats. Some will say this proves we need to fight terror, while others will say this proves we were wrong to fight it. You know where I stand, but whatever the case may be, the most important thing to remember is that terrorists did this, and terrorists deserve to take the heat for it. We don't even know for sure if it was Al Qaeda, but it was undoubtedly terrorists. They are the true enemy, and nobody should have any excuse to believe differently.

I know this isn't the most profound post ever written, but with all the bullshit we've been through since 9/11, I thought I'd remind everyone that evil still exists, and it's more dangerous than any of the childish domestic squabbles happening on a daily basis.

And in case they missed it, a final message for the terrorists:

DIE, MOTHERFUCKERS.

The NYT Craps On Progress

I didn't watch President Bush's speech last night, but I did read a transcript, and after seeing a few positive reviews, I decided to watch a video.

Dude...who was that guy behind the microphone? He looked like Dubya...but he was actually speaking well! I'm impressed. Aside from the usual "nucular" issue, this was one of his best speeches. The message and the delivery were both very effective.

Unfortunately, our friends at the New York Times have decided that he didn't really say anything important, and that Iraq is still a QUAAAAAAAAGMIIIIIIIIRE!!!! Check out this asshatted editorial:

President Bush's Speech About Iraq

President Bush told the nation last night that the war in Iraq was difficult but winnable. Only the first is clearly true.

Of course, if your view of the world is clouded by irrational Bush hatred.

Despite buoyant cheerleading by administration officials...

I can almost taste the immaturity that inspired that statement.

...the military situation is at best unimproved.

Seriously, how can they get away with this level of asininity? Are they incapable of seeing any positive effects of the war? What is it going to take to please you people? I want answers!!!

The Iraqi Army, despite Mr. Bush's optimistic descriptions, shows no signs of being able to control the country without American help for years to come.

At the current level of training, that may be true. But as more of the country is secured and more time can be devoted to preparing them to defend themselves, the situation should improve. But in order to admit this, you'd have to accept the fact that the military is actually accomplishing something.

There are not enough American soldiers to carry out the job they have been sent to do...

Let's see here...who should I believe? An anonymous newspaper editor, or the military commanders who are actually in Iraq? It's such a tough decision.

...yet the strain of maintaining even this inadequate force is taking a terrible toll on the ability of the United States to defend its security on other fronts around the world.

Such as...? It's not like every single U.S. troop in the world is occupied right now.

We did not expect Mr. Bush would apologize for the misinformation that helped lead us into this war...

Since he wasn't responsible for that misinformation, I don't know why he should have to.

...or for the catastrophic mistakes his team made in running the military operation.

Once again, notice the complete lack of examples. They do this so people who already agree with them can insert some event that fits their perception of a "catastrophe," and people who disagree won't have any factual information to work with. It's brilliant in an illogical kind of way.

But we had hoped he would resist the temptation to raise the bloody flag of 9/11 over and over again to justify a war in a country that had nothing whatsoever to do with the terrorist attacks.

Unbelievable. You idiots still don't get it. The War on Terror is not about revenge. It's about preventing another 9/11 from happening. If war was just about retaliation, we wouldn't have fought Germany in WWII. If you had actually listened to Bush's speech, maybe you would understand how replacing totalitarian dictators with democratically elected leaders helps stop terrorism. But that would require you to think, and if you could do that, you wouldn't be liberal.

We had hoped that he would seize the moment to tell the nation how he will define victory, and to give Americans a specific sense of how he intends to reach that goal - beyond repeating the same wishful scenario that he has been describing since the invasion.

Let's go to the transcript and illustrate your mind-boggling ignorance:

A little over a year ago, I spoke to the nation and described our coalition's goal in Iraq. I said that America's mission in Iraq is to defeat an enemy and give strength to a friend, a free, representative government that is an ally in the war on terror and a beacon of hope in a part of the world that is desperate for reform. I outlined the steps we would take to achieve this goal: We would hand authority over to a sovereign Iraqi government; we would help Iraqis hold free elections by January 2005; we would continue helping Iraqis rebuild their nation's infrastructure and economy; we would encourage more international support for Iraq's democratic transition; and we would enable Iraqis to take increasing responsibility for their own security and stability.

And a bit later:

The principal task of our military is to find and defeat the terrorists and that is why we are on the offense. And as we pursue the terrorists, our military is helping to train Iraqi security forces so that they can defend their people and fight the enemy on their own. Our strategy can be summed up this way: As the Iraqis stand up, we will stand down.

Is that enough for you, you pretentious pricks?

Sadly, Mr. Bush wasted his opportunity last night, giving a speech that only answered questions no one was asking.

A "fact" that I just disproved, incidentally.

He told the nation, again and again, that a stable and democratic Iraq would be worth American sacrifices, while the nation was wondering whether American sacrifices could actually produce a stable and democratic Iraq.

They're doing a pretty good job so far. Unless you people actually take my "the war won't be a success until Iraq has a space program" joke seriously.

Given the way this war was planned and executed, the president does not have any good options available...

Mmmmm...non-sequiturs...

...and if American forces were withdrawn, Iraq would probably sink into a civil war that would create large stretches of no man's land where private militias and stateless terrorists could operate with impunity.

Which is why Bush specifically said that American forces won't be pulled out until they're no longer needed. What were you saying earlier about answering questions nobody asked?

But if Mr. Bush is intent on staying the course, it will take years before the Iraqi government and its military are able to stand on their own.

Oh, is that the problem? Well, then let's just tell Dubya to push the magical "make Iraq a successful democracy in an instant" button! All those mean insurgents will just disappear, and Iraq will be a land of fairies and butterflies and enchanted pink unicorns that crap out pieces of delicious candy.

...Do I really need to add the sarcasm tags?

Most important of all - despite his lofty assurance last night that in the end the insurgents "cannot stop the advance of freedom" - all those years of effort and suffering could still end with the Iraqis turning on each other, or deciding that the American troops were the ultimate enemy after all.

Yes, and it could also end with everyone suddenly bursting into song and dance, but that probably won't happen. Aren't hypothetical scenarios fun?

The critical challenge is to gauge, with a clear head, exactly when and if the tipping point arrives and the American presence is only making a terrible situation worse.

At this point, I'm almost convinced that the writer didn't even read a summary of Bush's speech, because I'm pretty sure he covered this.

Mr. Bush has been under pressure, even from some Republicans, to come up with a timeline for an exit.

And he explained why that would be a terrible idea.

It makes no sense to encourage the insurrectionists...

What happened? Is "insurgents" no longer P.C.?

...by telling them that if their suicide bombers continue to blow themselves up at the current rate, the Americans will be leaving in six months or a year. It is Iraq's elected officials, who desperately need an American presence, who have to be told that Washington's support isn't open-ended.

And this differs from current policy...how, exactly?

The elected government is the only hope, but its current performance is far from promising. While the support of the Shiite's powerful Ayatollah Ali al-Sistani for the democratic elections was heartening, the Shiite majority in Parliament is mainly composed of religious parties competing to demonstrate that they have the ayatollah's ear. The Kurds continue to put broader national interests behind their own goal of an autonomous ministate that would include the oil fields of Kirkuk. The Sunnis, who boycotted the election, are only now being brought into the constitution-writing effort and so far have made no real effort to mobilize against the terrorists in their midst.

Once again, we see the writer taking the position that just because something hasn't happened yet, it never will. I think the whole "Sunnis participating in the constitutional process" thing indicates that progress is being made. Once again, there is no magical button that will make this stuff happen instantly. Considering the fact that Iraq was a dictatorship for decades, it's amazing that they're moving forward this fast. But of course, if the eeeeeeevil Republicans are responsible for it, it can't be good.

Pressure from the Bush administration for the government to do better has increased since the State Department took control of Iraq policy from the Pentagon. But there is much more to do, and the president needed to show the American people that he is not giving the Iraqi politicians a blank check to fritter away their opportunities.

Once they have a working constitution, I'm sure they'll have a better idea of what they're supposed to do.

Listening to Mr. Bush offer the usual emotional rhetoric about the advance of freedom and the sacrifice of American soldiers, our thoughts went back to some of the letters we received in anticipation of the speech. One was from the brother of a fallen Marine, who said he did not want Mr. Bush to say the war should continue in order to keep faith with the men and women who have died fighting it. "We do not need more justifications for the war. We need an effective strategy to win it," he wrote.

Well, mission accomplished.

Another letter came from an opponent of the invasion who urged the American left to "get over its anger over President Bush's catastrophic blunder" and start trying to figure out how to win the conflict that exists.

What is this mysterious "catastrophe" they keep referring to? Man, I'm glad I don't live in that liberal fantasy world. It seems like a dark and scary place.

No one wants a disaster in Iraq...

*cough*Ward Churchill*cough*

...and Mr. Bush's critics can put aside, at least temporarily, their anger at the administration for its hubris...

I believe that in less touchy-feely circles, it's known as "confidence."

...its terrible planning...

"The troops actually had to fight! We're doooooooomed!!!"

...and its inept conduct of the war...

Yet another accusation that's only valid if you already agree with the person making it. Brilliant.

...in return for a frank discussion of where to go from here.

But unfortunately, they're too busy holding mock impeachment hearings and calling the troops Nazis.

The president, who is going to be in office for another three and a half years...

Bwahaha.

...cannot continue to obsess about self-justification and the need to color Iraq with the memory of 9/11.

Why should he, when he could just pretend 9/11 never happened like you morons?

The nation does not want it and cannot afford it.

If by "the nation," you mean "the editorial staff of a liberal paper," then you may be right. Otherwise, you need to stop acting like you speak for anyone but yourselves.

How Utterly Horrible

If you need even more proof that the left is collectively hyperventilating about nothing over this Gitmo BS, check out one of the chillingly gulag-like tortures inflicted on a poor prisoner:

...not only was the temperature unbearably hot, but extremely loud rap music was being played in the room, and had been since the day before...

Hey, that reminds me of dorm life! I'm going to demand that Syracuse University be shut down for human rights violations!

Idiots.

(Hat tip: LGF)

Did YOU Know?

Heh. I just got this from the College Republicans listserv:

Did you know that 47 countries have re-established their embassies in Iraq?

Did you know that the Iraqi government employs 1.2 million Iraqi people?

Did you know that 3100 schools have been renovated, 364 schools are under
rehabilitation, 263 schools are now under construction and 38 new schools
have been built in Iraq?

Did you know that Iraq's higher educational structure consists of 20
Universities, 46 Institutes or colleges and 4 research centers?

Did you know that 25 Iraq students departed for the United States in January
2004 for the re-established Fulbright program?

Did you know that the Iraqi Navy is operational? They have 5 x 100-foot
patrol craft, 34 smaller vessels and a naval infantry regiment.

Did you know that Iraq's Air Force consists of three operational squadrons,
9 reconnaissance and 3 US C-130 transport aircraft which operate day and
night, and will soon add 16 UH-1 helicopters and 4
bell jet rangers?

Did you know that Iraq has a counter-terrorist unit and a Commando
Battalion?

Did you know that the Iraqi Police Service has over 55,000 fully trained and
equipped police officers?

Did you know that there are 5 Police Academies in Iraq that produce over
3500 new officers each 8 weeks?

Did you know there are more than 1100 building projects going on in Iraq?
They include 364 schools, 67 public clinics, 15 hospitals, railroad
stations, 22 oil facilities, 93 water facilities and electrical facilities.

Did you know that 96% of Iraqi children under the age of 5 have received the
first 2 series of polio vaccinations?

Did you know that 4.3 million Iraqi children were enrolled in primary school
by mid October?

Did you know that there are 1,192,000 cell phone subscribers in Iraq and
phone use has gone up 158%?

Did you know that Iraq has an independent media that consist of 75 radio
stations, 180 newspapers and 10 television stations?

Did you know that the Baghdad Stock Exchange opened in June of 2004?

Did you know that 2 candidates in the Iraqi election had a televised debate
recently?

OF COURSE WE DIDN'T KNOW!

WHY DIDN'T WE KNOW? OUR MEDIA WOULDN'T TELL US!

Because a Bush- hating media and Democratic Party would rather see the world
blow up than lose their power.

Instead of shouting these accomplishments from every rooftop, they would
rather show photo's of what a few perverted malcontent soldiers have done in
prisons in many cases never disclosing the circumstances surrounding the
events.

Instead of showing our love for our country, we get photos of flag burning
incidents at Abu Ghraib and people throwing snowballs at presidential
motorcades.

The lack of accentuating the positive in Iraq serves only one purpose. It
undermines the world's perception of the United States and our soldiers

Pass it on!

Let Freedom Reign

Well, the people have spoken in Iraq. Despite the best efforts of terrorists, democracy has won. But why take it from me when you can hear from Mohammed and Omar, Ali, Alaa, Hammorabi, and many other Iraqi bloggers who have a voice for the first time? This is truly a historic day.

Just a word of advice: Don't go to DU unless you want to hear about "puppet governments" and assorted tinfoil hat crap like that. Trust me on this.

W. T. F?!

Remember that post about the photographs of insurgents?

Go to this article, watch the "With the insurgents of Fallujah" slideshow, then join me in wondering when it became okay to follow the enemy around.

Oh, but wait, the photographer is French, so it's okay.

*bashes head against wall*

Interesting...

Who said the following?

It never occurred to us that he, the commander in chief of the country, would leave 50,000 citizens in the two towers to face those horrors alone, because he thought listening to a child discussing her goats was more important.

If you guessed Michael Moore, you're wrong. Go here for the answer.

Murderers

The Iraqis who have risen up against the occupation are not "insurgents" or "terrorists" or "The Enemy." They are the REVOLUTION, the Minutemen, and their numbers will grow -- and they will win.

/sarcasm

UPDATE
Great minds, etc., etc.